Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 08:00 pm

Not All Heroes Wear Name Tags

Posted by Not Always Right

Read Not All Heroes Wear Name Tags

I'm about to go into the parking lot to collect the loose carts that customers leave dotted around. I see a customer walking her empty cart back to the corrals after loading her car. Another customer shouts at her.
Other Customer: "Why are you doing that and being a chump? It's their job to put those back, not yours!"

Read Not All Heroes Wear Name Tags

I Can Has Cheezburger? ([syndicated profile] icanhascheezburger_feed) wrote2025-12-20 11:00 am

22 Feline Funnies to Hiss Your Hardships Away

Posted by Ayala Sorotsky

Cats can turn any frown upside down. It's just the meowgic that comes with being a living thing of the feline form. Imagine being able to make everyone around you happy just by existing. It's hard to imagine if you're not a cat - because this is a special cat trait. If there is any sort of sadness around a cat, it's like they cancel it. And they don't even have to do anything in particular for it to work. They're just sort of standing there, maybe loafing, perhaps purring - and every negative emotion simply runs away, disappears.

Are you sad next to a cat? They'd just scootch closer to you and roll into a cinnamon bun on your lap - and it's like sadness wasn't even in your vocabulary to begin with. Are you angry next to a cat? They simply paw at you gently, maybe even making some biscuits - and it's like an instant calmer for any wrath that might've been there before. Are you bored next to a cat? They'd bring you their favorite toy, because playing with a cat is never boring. Are you afraid of nothing next to a cat? They'll come and purr on your chest - like reassuring vibrations of joy and relaxation.

Cats are the purrfect negation for anything negative. And that comes across so clearly with cat memes - the ultimate combination of human humor and cat cuteness.

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 06:55 pm
I Can Has Cheezburger? ([syndicated profile] icanhascheezburger_feed) wrote2025-12-20 10:00 am

Caturday Medley: 20+ Most Meowrvelous Weekly Cat Memes Collected by Your Cheezburger Expawrts

Posted by Ayala Sorotsky

Look, faline fam, we're not saying our fingers are frozen at this point of the year, so it's hard to type out our Caturday thoughts, but… this is exactly what we're saying. So, in light of recent finger freezing, we're letting our office cats take control. Why? Well, first of all, we really want to go and warm our hands. Second of all, this is about the best weekly cat memes, after all - so why won't our cats curate it for once? They are the stars of the show.

Here's what Bondo, our senior tabby chonker bonker king has to say: "I'm not taking responsibility for any ruptured ribs from laughing too much. After all, it's memes that we, the cats, have chosen. And we do it best, as you know. Now, where is my hourly treat, hooman peasant?"

And here are the words of Nessy, the elegant and long-tailed calico queen: "Of course you address me as queen. You may now also address me as empress of cat memes, ruling over feline internet humor, curated for cat lovers from all over the world. Because this is how you all just are - a network of global cat servants. Please, dears, never change. You're all purrfect."

Lastly, here's what Joggle, the zoomies-ridden brainless orange kitten has to say: "654;lkkhjd seraassa zzzzzzzzzzzz" Sorry- Um- Sorry guys. He just zoomied over the keyboard. We have no idea where he ran to. We should go and look for him before he breaks something… bye.

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 06:45 pm

Minimum Wage, Minimum Control

Posted by Not Always Right

Read Minimum Wage, Minimum Control

Customer: "I'm very upset with the giant poster you have on the mall outside! It's a giant poster of women in lingerie, and all the men are looking at it!"
Me: "I see. Well, ma'am, if you'd like to make a complaint, you can go to our website, and–"
Customer: "—I'm not going to some website! I'm talking to you, right here and now!"

Read Minimum Wage, Minimum Control

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 06:00 pm
I Can Has Cheezburger? ([syndicated profile] icanhascheezburger_feed) wrote2025-12-20 09:00 am

24 Purrfectly Hissterical Cat Pics From Real Pawrents Wrapped and Ready for Christmas Meowrning

Posted by Blake Seidel

You would think that, since our job is to look at cute and funny kitties on the internet all day, we would get tired of it. Well, that's where you'd be wrong! There is no such thing as too many cats, and until we've seen a picture of every single cat on this planet, we won't rest. It doesn't matter if it's a hilariously blurry cat picture of a cat mid-zoomies, or a purrfect angle posing for the camera, we could scroll through our furvorite fluffy felines all day, every day. 

Dog people get to pet dogs on the street, but cat people don't get such a luxury. And thus, enjoying cute cat pics from the hooman servants to our feline overlords is our version of petting doggos. It brings us joy, seeing all these awwdorable kitties stretching their toe beans, relaxing in a warm spot in the sun, or giving their hoomans bombtastic side-eye. We see that they are cared for, loved, even doted on, and although we can't give them our love, it's enough to know that they are.

So, no filters, no famous cats, no supermeowdels here, just some average cats for your enjoyment. But, really, is any cat actually average? They're our gift to you, this Catmas, and some of them are already wrapped up and ready to be placed under the tree!

I Can Has Cheezburger? ([syndicated profile] icanhascheezburger_feed) wrote2025-12-20 08:00 am

'You may have just saved a life': Pawrent finds cold kitten with 102 fever hiding in their garage, t

Posted by Blake Seidel

Turns out that the Christmas tree isn't the only place to find surprise purresents this year. You might find them meowing from outside your window, or shivering in your garage! These gifts may come without fancy wrapping paper or a pretty bow on top, but they'll be the best gift you get all year. This gift, of course, is a new cat, and the best part is - it's free! 

One pawrent found this seriously smol kitten shivering in their garage, and noticing that something was wrong, they immediately took them to the vet. Turns out the kitten had a 102-degree fever, and without meowdical intervention, he might not have made it. Now, he's at home, all warmed up and healing. After about two days, they said the kitten was running around, playing, and eating normally. Yay! Unfurtunately, they have a cat at home that doesn't take too kindly to strangers, so they searched around for a family to take him. One wholesome neighbor stepped up and decided to become the fluffy feline's furrever family

This gift just keeps on giving. The pawrent saved a cat's life, and then gave that life to another family to expurrience all the love that comes with adding a new kitten to your home. Purrfectly heartwarming, and just in time for the holidays!

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 04:00 pm

Pour Judgment

Posted by Not Always Right

Read Pour Judgment

I'm at a table, and I turn around with their dirty plates to bring to the back, and I see one of the dudes reaching over and pouring himself a beer from his seat - and doing so very poorly, as the bar is huge.

Read Pour Judgment

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 03:30 pm

This Story Starts As A Pile Of Crock And Gets Worse

Posted by Not Always Right

Read This Story Starts As A Pile Of Crock And Gets Worse

I'm not allowed to touch crock pots.
When I was a kid, I broke one. It was my night for dishes, and a heavy ceramic pot plus wet child-sized hands meant it slipped and broke. For Christmas, my grandmother bought my mum a new one, because my mum used her crock pot a lot.
I broke that one, too.

Read This Story Starts As A Pile Of Crock And Gets Worse

I Can Has Cheezburger? ([syndicated profile] icanhascheezburger_feed) wrote2025-12-20 07:00 am

Dad’s ex-girlfriend’s grandma’s 14-year-old cat reunites with the daughter after 7 years apart, and

Posted by Mariel Ruvinsky

Even though we have been cat owners for many, many years, every single time that we go on a slightly longer than usual vacation, we find ourselves worried - a tiny bit - that our cats will forget about us. We know they won't. We know that our bond with our cats is so strong that even a truly long break wouldn't remove their memories of us. And yet… the concern does cross our minds. And then we see a story like this - a reuinion between a cat and a person, and our worries disappear. 

After seven whole years apart, this person reunites with their cat. The cat never belonged to them in the first place, it was someone else's cat that they bonded with, and the connection between them and that someone else broke. But now, things are coming together again, and the happiest part of it all? The cat clearly remembers this person. You only need to read about their first meeting to know that for a fact. No worries necessary. 

I Can Has Cheezburger? ([syndicated profile] icanhascheezburger_feed) wrote2025-12-20 06:00 am

Your Weekly Caturday Meowgazine: 20 Most Iconic I Can Has Meowments, From Utterly Goofy to Genuinely

Posted by Mariel Ruvinsky

Another week is officially over, and that means that we can finally take a breath. It's been a long one, guys. Christmas is right around the corner, preparations are at their most intense, and it feels like every break that we take is time that could be spent more productively. We're here to tell you that is not true. Some breaks are not only good, they are required. And taking a break to go through the best cat content of the week in this week's Caturday meowgazine is something that simply has to be done. 

As always, we've put together the best cat tweets of the week, the funniest cat memes that people shared, and the most wholesome cat stories that hit the internet this week. And you are here because you know that you deserve this break just as much as we know it. A break that is full of nothing but cats and pawsitivity. A break that is legitimately productive. You know why? Because it's going to end with you smiling. 

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 02:30 pm

Wait Until He Discovers Slaying…

Posted by Not Always Right

Read Wait Until He Discovers Slaying…

We have a Korean friend in the group who moved to the US a couple of years ago. Their English is more than proficient, but they struggle with colloquial phrases and can't tell when not to take things literally.
Korean Friend: "What… is in that bread?!"

Read Wait Until He Discovers Slaying…

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 01:45 pm

(no subject)

Posted by Not Always Right

Read

TW: Mention of self harm I’ve recently obtained a new kitten, and while he’s adorable, he’s currently in a stage where he attacks hands and feet, especially if they’re exposed on the bed at night. As a result, both of my hands and forearms are covered with kitten scratches that look a heck of a […]

Read

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 12:45 pm

(no subject)

Posted by Not Always Right

Read

We all know that flight delays are no fun for anyone. I’m in a truly massive line (which has been about this long for the last hour or so – I tried to deal with what I needed before getting in the line, but a certain airline which has a hub here doesn’t let /anyone/ […]

Read

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 12:00 pm

(no subject)

Posted by Not Always Right

Read

One morning, I woke up with the flu and a high fever above 39C (or 102F). I’m feeling nauseous and dizzy as well. It’s a legal requirement in my country to have a doctor certify that you’re sick, in order to get rest days from school or work, so off I go to see the […]

Read

I Can Has Cheezburger? ([syndicated profile] icanhascheezburger_feed) wrote2025-12-20 02:00 am

26 Funny Feline Posts to Honor the Fluffy Friends Helping You Survive the Holidays

Posted by Isabella Penn

The holiday season is officially in full swing, which means most of us are currently oscillating between festive cheer and a total sensory meltdown. Between the aggressive scent of pine-scented candles and the looming dread of a family political debate over lukewarm mashed potatoes, it's a lot to handle. While some people turn to weighted blankets or overpriced peppermint mochas to cope, a specific group of us rely on a much more chaotic support system: the house cat.

Cats don't care that you're behind on your gift shopping or that your tinsel is technically a choking hazard. In fact, they seem to view the entire holiday apparatus—the trees, the ribbons, the expensive charcuterie boards—as a personal playground designed specifically for their amusement. Whether they're perched precariously inside the branches of a Douglas fir or judging your third consecutive viewing of a cheesy Hallmark movie, cats have a way of grounding the holiday madness by reminding us that, at the end of the day, a nap is always more important than a party.

There is a certain irony in looking to a creature that lacks basic social graces for emotional stability during the most social month of the year. While we're busy worrying about whether the turkey is dry or if the neighbors liked their gift baskets, the cat is busy trying to eat a piece of plastic. There is something deeply enviable about that level of singular focus. They aren't burdened by the social obligation of "checking in" or making small talk with a coworker at a gift exchange. They just exist, and usually, they exist in a state of mild disappointment that you haven't shared your salmon.

Funny & True Stories | NotAlwaysRight.com ([syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-20 11:00 am

(no subject)

Posted by Not Always Right

Read

This is a sequel to https://notalwaysright.com/shouldve-been-an-email-assuming-they-can-read/337608/ The client in question came in. And he was extremely deaf even in person. His tax pro, a woman who’s not known for being particularly loud, had to shout every single question she asked. “ARE YOU PRESENTLY MARRIED?” she shouted at him, at roughly the volume of a 747 […]

Read