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Cancellations Are On A Roll
Jul. 12th, 2025 05:00 am![[syndicated profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/feed.png){kind=small}
notalwaysright_feedRead Cancellations Are On A Roll
Customer: "Hiiii… you're going to hate me."
Me: "How can I help?"
Customer: "Sorry, we ordered too much food. Can you cancel the baked lobster roll?"
The one that is ALREADY IN THE OVEN.
You’re Looking For Binoculars, Not Bifocals
Jul. 12th, 2025 03:00 amnotalwaysright_feedRead You’re Looking For Binoculars, Not Bifocals
I work for an optician and eyeglass retailer. A customer has just had some new lenses made and is testing them out in his new glasses. He looks unimpressed.
Customer: "How do I zoom in?"
Will Not Be Influenced By The Influencer, Part 11
Jul. 12th, 2025 01:00 amnotalwaysright_feedRead Will Not Be Influenced By The Influencer, Part 11
Me: "We don’t do comped meals for exposure. But you’re absolutely welcome to review us if you’re dining as a regular guest."
Customer: "Wow. You’d rather miss out on thousands of eyes than give away one lunch?"
This Task Became A Paper Chase
Jul. 12th, 2025 12:00 amnotalwaysright_feedRead This Task Became A Paper Chase
Tech Support: "If the printer asks for paper, please add paper. This is not something you should submit a ticket for. This is something you can do yourself."
Me: "Thank you for the response. The paper tray is filled to the brim. It still asks for paper when scanning."
Tech Support: "Please add paper to the max line."
Me: "Paper present. Still does not scan."
If Only There Was A Word For Getting People To Do Unpaid Labor…
Jul. 11th, 2025 11:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead If Only There Was A Word For Getting People To Do Unpaid Labor…
A customer has been walked through a high-end custom kitchen setup. Top-line appliances, imported finishes, marble worktops, brass fittings, the works. We sit down to go through the itemised quote. As expected, it’s not cheap.
Customer: "I’m sorry, this can’t be right. This is the price with installation?"
Read If Only There Was A Word For Getting People To Do Unpaid Labor…
22 Cozy Cat Memes for a Friday Full of Flicks, Fur, and Fun
Jul. 11th, 2025 02:00 pmicanhascheezburger_feedFriday night? Time to paws everything because it's meowvie night! When the sun sets and the snacks come out, cats across the land settle in for some serious screen time. Sure, they might not follow the plot, but they're all about the purrspective.
First, they claim the coziest blanket (and the remote), then dramatically knock over the popcorn just to prove they're the real stars of the show. Every action scene becomes a zoomie trigger, and any emotional moment is a cue for them to sit directly in front of the screen. Need subtitles? Too bad, there's a tail in the way.
Rom-coms? They'll sit through it, but only if there's a lap involved. Horror? That's just background noise for a late-night game of claw-the-couch. And if it's a nature documentary? Expect some paws on interaction with the wildlife on screen.
At the end of the night, the cat's curled up, the snacks are gone, and no one remembers what the movie was about, but it doesn't matter. Because Fridays are for fur, flicks, and feline drama.
Fluff. Chaos. Drama! Our weekly cat newsletter has it all - subscribe here.
Marketing Is Not Their Calling
Jul. 11th, 2025 10:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead Marketing Is Not Their Calling
Owner: "Fairs and expos abroad would cost too much for us to be present, between shipping materials and people there. I have a better idea: take the Yellow Pages for the biggest city and give a phone call to all plumbers you find in there and offer them our products."
Locked But Not Locked Down
Jul. 11th, 2025 09:30 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead Locked But Not Locked Down
This one time, though, our dispatch operators forwarded a call by a citizen asking for said footage, because when she came back to her car, she noticed someone had rummaged around in it.
There’s A Latte To Unpack Here…
Jul. 11th, 2025 09:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead There’s A Latte To Unpack Here…
A customer walks in, talking loudly on her phone, and doesn't pause the call while ordering.
Customer: *Into phone.* "Hang on, I need to get my coffee, yes, that one, the one they always mess up."
22 Pawfect Pictures of Cozy Cats in PJs Ready to Sleep Away the Weekend
Jul. 11th, 2025 01:00 pmicanhascheezburger_feedWhen it comes to bedtime furshion, cats in PJs are the cozy kings and queens of cuteness. These pajama-clad purrfectionists prove even the fluffiest creatures know how to relax in style. Whether it's a tiny onesie, a snug hoodie, or striped sleepers, these sleepyheads rock their bedtime look with pawsome flair.
Cats in PJs don't just nap. They purrform serious snooze sessions, curled up tighter than a catnip mouse in a mitten. They're champions of chill, masters of midnight cuddles, and sultans of snuggle. And if you think they're just in it for comfort, think again. Those pajamas add an extra dose of adorable that's almost too much to handle!
Sometimes they flash the classic "I'm ready for bedtime" side-eye, like, "Hooman, why are you still up?" Other times, they wiggle and squirm trying to get those PJs just right, proving even the fluffiest fashionistas can be finicky.
No matter the style, cats in PJs bring a whole new meaning to "catnap couture," turning bedtime into a catwalk of cuteness!
Fluff. Chaos. Drama! Our weekly cat newsletter has it all - subscribe here.
icanhascheezburger_feedThis whiskered wanderer started as a skittish visitor, hissing from afar and vanishing for weeks at a time. But over the past couple of months, she's gone from cautious guest to full-time purrsistor. Rain-soaked paws and early-morning meows turned into long naps and heart-melting cuddles. Despite gentle efforts to encourage her to return to her original humans, she keeps choosing the place where she feels safe, warm, and wanted.
Her official pawrents? Barely batted an eye. No missing posters, no concerned knocks, just a casual "Oh yeah, that's our cat!" and a laugh about her new feeding spot. They didn't even know her name. One might say this kitty has been emotionally abandoned without the paperwork.
Now, the human who's been unintentionally adopted is stuck between a cat and a hard place. Rental rules forbid pets, but the guilt of turning away a feline who's clearly chosen her new family is crushing. She's underweight, underloved, and over the old home. And she's not going back without a fight… or a nap first.
Fluff. Chaos. Drama! Our weekly cat newsletter has it all - subscribe here.
Doesn’t Have A Penny To Their Name
Jul. 11th, 2025 08:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead Doesn’t Have A Penny To Their Name
Cashier: "That's $2.01."
Customer: *Hands over $2.*
Cashier: "It's $2.01, sir
Customer: "I don't understand."
A Dog Pees On A Post, Not Gets Shipped By Them
Jul. 11th, 2025 07:00 pmnotalwaysright_feedRead A Dog Pees On A Post, Not Gets Shipped By Them
A customer approaches my counter carrying a small crate with air holes. I assume it's a package with fragile items… until it sneezes.
Me: "Ma’am… is there a dog in there?"